last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
