I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
