whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
