Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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