Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
