Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
