Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
