Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize