I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
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