Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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