batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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