I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
