i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
