I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
