she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Randomize
