He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Cover your peen. We're going out.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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