The brown eye won't let me do that either.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
