so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Randomize
