My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
