i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm sitting next to this guy at the bar. I wrote him a little song in my head it goes "there is no fucking chance you're getting in my pants" gonna sing it to him after he buys me another drink.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
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The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
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