i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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