how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
