you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Randomize
