dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Randomize