"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
