you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
