And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize