Pappa wants mamma naked
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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