Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize