I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
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