No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
What a dumb baby whore.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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