Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
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