I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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