I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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