is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Randomize
