I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
