i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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