I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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