Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
So vagazzling was a success
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
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