dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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