who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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