Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
smell my finger.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
where are my eyebrows?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
