i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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