Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize
