I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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