My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
So. Much. Porn.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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