if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
