Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
