508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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