How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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