Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
